Donald Trump has reacted with surprise and confusion at being told the United States has a ‘Constitution’.
The Presidential hopeful is apparently angered at claims ‘some dumb old piece of paper’ won’t let him do anything he damn well pleases when elected.
Trump has proposed several controversial policies, including billeting soldiers on the citizenry, search without warrant, and unifying church and state – and is reported to be furious some stupid dead guys say he can’t.
“I don’t know what this ‘Constitution’ is or what it says,” Trump told whooping supporters.
“But I’m damned if I’ll let it tell the Trumpster what he can do!
“The whole concept sounds distinctly un-American.
“America is a land of freedom, and if some stupid old Constitution says you ain’t free to do something, I say strike it down!”
Trump’s aides are reported to be drawing straws over who gets to tell him about the Bill of Rights and Habeas Corpus.