Photographs of a six-month old baby have lived up to the usual low standards.
Buckingham Palace released photos of six-month old Princess Charlotte doing precisely fuck-all outside of what is expected of a child of that age.
“I’m not sure why I got my hopes up,” sighed Simon Williams, a fan of the Royal Family who ‘lives’ in Shrewsbury.
“In an ideal world, the kid would be swinging through a plate-glass window while dual-wielding a pair of AK-47s.
“Obviously Charlotte can’t do that yet, at least I assume not, otherwise we should pop her in the army right away.
“But Kate and William could have had a whale of time on photoshop and given us something to remember, rather than the kind of tedious shite I’ll usually scroll past on Facebook.”
A Palace spokesman said. “It’s a photo of a baby. I’m afraid ‘boring’ comes with the territory.
“One of us did knock together a pic of Princess Charlotte water-skiing across Lake Windermere, and nobody has seen him since. So I suggest you take these and you like them.”