Politician starts wearing next year’s poppy early to shame rivals

author avatar by 9 years ago

A politician has started wearing a 2016 Remembrance Day poppy over 11 months early to shame his rivals today.

Backbencher Simon Williams has started wearing the poppy to make his respect for the fallen really, really obvious nice and early and is confident that the decision will not leave him open to criticism.

Williams, who was beaten in poppy wearing by political rivals this year has made absolutely certain he’s going to be first next November by popping one into his buttonhole 364 days in advance.

Explaining his decision, Williams told us “Back in October I was on Question Time and all those other bastards were wearing poppies and I looked really bad.”

“Well for the next year the boot is going to be on the other foot.”

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“Who looks stupid now, eh?”

When asked where he got a poppy this far ahead, Williams explained he’d fished it out of the bin oustide Jeremy Corbyn’s office.