Elton John and Vladimir Putin to record new version of ‘Nikita’

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Elton John has revealed plans to meet with Russian President Vladimir Putin in Moscow to discuss LGBT rights and record a new version of cold war classic ‘Nikita’.

“We’ve been looking to record together for a long time now,” said the shirtless Russian President as he wrestled a polar bear.

“And Sir Elton’s ‘Nikita’ has always held a fond place in my heart as Nikita was the name of the first young woman I had sent to a gulag.”

It is understood that they intend to keep a very similar musical arrangement, with the possible addition of some sleigh-bells to give the song a seasonal flavour.

Sir Elton will still carry the majority of the vocal, with President Putin taking the high harmony as he has an unnaturally girlish singing voice.

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“It’s all tremendously exciting,” said Sir Elton

“It is a great privilege to be the guests of a Russian president, so David’s picked up some lovely luxury chocolate biscuits from Markses and a hilarious t-shirt of Larry Grayson saying ‘You ruddy big poof,’ as gifts for Mr Putin.”

President Putin joins a glittering array of superstars who have previously recorded with Sir Elton including Chris Rea, PM Dawn, and Kiki f**king Dee.