David Cameron vows to fight dead migrants on the beaches

author avatar by 9 years ago

Prime Minister David Cameron has pledged to fight deceased migrants on the beaches, or wherever they wash up.

As tragic pictures of a migrant boy lying dead on an EU beach circled the globe, the Tories warned that ‘swarms’ of refugees were using death as their latest tactic to enter the country.

And the government fears that if the same thing happens on the British coast, Dover beach could lose its prestigious Blue Flag award.

Cameron said, “Let me be absolutely clear. This country is confronted with the worst migrant invasion since the Angles and Saxons and we all know how that turned out.”

“We are faced with the very real prospect of rosy-cheeked English children having their game of sandcastles rudely interrupted by the bloated corpse on an immigrant travelling on a false passport.”

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He droned on, “This morning the British Ambassador in Paris handed the French Government a final Note stating that, unless we heard from them by 11 o’clock that they were prepared at once to withdraw their migrants from Calais, a state of war would exist between us.”

“I mean a state of war between us and the migrants – not the French, although if that’s what they want then bring it on.”

“I have to tell you now that no such undertaking has been received, and that consequently this country is at war with those fleeing persecution.”

Borrowing slightly from Churchill, Cameron added, “We shall defend our island, whatever the cost to the taxpayer.”

“We shall fight dead migrants on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight them in the container lorries and on the Eurostar.”

“We shall never surrender.”