Both television and print news are reported to be ‘thrilled’ by the murders of two people on live TV yesterday.
Newspapers and television ‘news’ programmes have focussed lovingly on the horrified expression of a woman about to be murdered, returning to it again and again with an obsessive zeal, whilst expressing shock and outrage over slowed down close-ups of the event.
“The deaths of two people is genuinely horrific…ly good for ratings!” we were told.
“By warning viewers that the footage we’re about to show is distressing and graphic, we’ve added ten points to our audience share.”
“Obviously these deaths are a senseless tragedy, but that said, we can’t change it so no point in letting such a terrific story go to waste, eh?”
“More footage at eleven.”
At least six major British newspapers have splashed the last moments of a human life on their front covers, helping ensure healthy sales and advertising revenues.
Meanwhile, campaigners and activists of every persuasion have seized upon the murders as clear evidence of why they are right and people who disagree with them are wrong.
However, everyone is united in agreement that at such a time of tragedy it is important to show sensitivity and respect to the bereaved relatives of the dead – such as not showing pictures and videos of them being murdered live on television.
As the shock of the deaths passes, reporters are suggesting the ISIS are really going to have to raise their game if they want to keep getting the coverage they’ve become used to.