Cameron to introduce Inequalities Minister to protect the rights of bigots

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Bigots, zealots and chauvinists will be given extra protection by the government after David Cameron announced he would be appointing an Inequalities Minister.

With bigotry and hatred under pressure from legislation and the court of public opinion, the government has moved to protect those who hold views most people find abhorrent.

As one government source explained. “Simply putting someone who voted against equal rights for gay couples in the role of Equalities Minister isn’t going far enough for many supporters, so we’ve listened and taken steps.”

“This new role will ensure people who hold hateful, prejudiced views will be free to impose them wherever they see fit.”

“The new minister will be responsible for making sure that any new British Bill of Rights we us to replace the European Human Rights legislation, holds dear the right to be mean to people we just don’t like.”

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Inequalities minister

Our source went on to explain this is the last cabinet position announced, due to an expected stampede from Tory MPs wanting to do the job.

They told us, “We had to do it last because literally everyone wants this job.”

“Iain Duncan-Smith has even offered the PM a blank cheque for just a month in the role.”

“He seemed to think he could do a lot of ‘good’ in the role.”