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Doctors have uncovered a new link between people having fat kids, and their inability to gauge the size of something standing right in front of them.
After researchers found that many parents were unable to identify their fat children as ‘obese’, doctors have begun searching for a cure to fix their eyesight.
Lead researcher Simon Williams told us, “What began as a study of the unhealthy eating habits of the nation’s obese children, has ended up uncovering a new eyesight disorder amongst the parents of obese children.
“It’s an unusual ailment, as they can go about their day totally unaffected, but they seem completely unable to focus on the rolls of fat hanging off the side of their progeny.
“We will aim for a cure, obviously, but right now diagnosis is the key.
“Try and pick up your child – if you’re unable to get your arms around them and can’t understand why, then you might be a sufferer – we would suggest consulting a doctor at your earliest convenience.”
Researchers have also suggested that identifying the gene responsible for the inability to see fat on a loved one, could provide a possible treatment for men who accidentally pause when asked if a ‘bum looks big in this’.
Chemist Shane Matthews said, “Millions of men have been caught out after being put in this terrible situation, as their brains just don’t work fast enough.
“But what if you only saw a skinny, healthy backside, no matter how big it was?
“We could save literally millions of relationships, maybe even with a simple pill you could buy from your pharmacist.
“So yes, that’s where we’ll be focussing our research budgets.”
