Professor Brian Cox to spend three nights staring up into his own anus

author avatar by 9 years ago

Celebrity astronomer Professor Brian Cox is to spend three consecutive nights staring up his own arse in a new BBC special.

The series, “Inside the rings”, was expected to be about Saturn but that just shows how wrong you can be.

“This magnificent brown star is truly worthy of rapt attention”, said Cox in a breathlessly excited way.

“What could be more wondrous than an exploration of one of the great wonders of the solar system – me.”

Much of the special is expected to be one continuous shot of Brian’s backside whilst he simply mutters “Wonderful. Truly wonderful” to himself.

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Press releases for the programme promise ‘exciting new vistas which will take your breath away.’

When asked, a senior BBC executive said they’d actually asked for a programme about Uranus and everyone had been too polite to say anything when it was taken the wrong way.

“We’re sure Brian knows best”, he added unconvincingly.