‘Ebony and Ivory’ to be re-released in wake of ‘The Dress’ controversy

author avatar by 9 years ago

Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder are to re-record their 80s classic ‘Ebony and Ivory’ as arguments over the colour of a dress continue to tear the Internet apart.

A picture of the dress has caused huge controversy since it was posted on Instagram, with millions of people drawn into a huge argument over what colour it actually is.

“It’s clearly Black and Blue”, said the fashion editor of Vogue magazine whilst beating her colleague over the head with a stapler.

“Some morons say otherwise but what do they know about clothing?”

“Stay down!”, she added to her colleague. “STAY DOWN.”

Meanwhile critical peace talks in the Ukraine have broken down with the two sides yelling “Black!” and “Gold!” at each other whilst brandishing automatic weaponry.

At a press conference in New York, McCartney and Wonder said they hoped that their song of harmony in the face of different colours might help bring peace back to a divided world.

“It’s all so silly”, said Paul McCartney to the assembled reporters.

“So much anger and argument over one White and Gold dress.”

“Hang on,” said Wonder.

“They told me the dress was Black and Blue.”

“This reunion is off, you colour-blind fucker.”