UKIP to reach out to male voters with A-Team van

author avatar by 9 years ago

UKIP have announced they will reach out to male voters by driving round in the A-Team van, according to reports today.

Following Labour’s new battle-bus policy of “Girls vote for pink things”, Nigel Farage took the decision to target the male vote after watching late-night repeats on cable TV.

The GMC van, owned by Mr. T in the series, has been brought in to attract the sort of voter who thinks the 1970s and early 80s were completely and utterly fantastic.

“As an iconic image of the early 1980s the van fits our manifesto and social policies perfectly”, said a UKIP spokesman.

“We’ll have Nigel Farage, he’ll be Hannibal, the man with a plan.”

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“Then there’s Godfrey Bloom as Face because he really knows how to talk to girls.”

“Plus ‘Howling Mad’ Murdoch, who writes our economic policies. ”

“There won’t be a black guy because, well, you know.”

UKIP A-Team van

The UKIP spokesperson went on to explain their plans for use of the van.

They continued, “We’ll drive round the country shooting our mouths off and promising to solve people’s problems before screeching away in a cloud of dust before we have to deal with any consequences.”

“If you think about it, it’s a perfect fit.”

*Breaking News* Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg has arrived at a news conference about the Eurozone crisis with a perm and tight, tight jeans driving the Knight Rider car.