Abuse review finds all evidence that records were destroyed has been destroyed

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The Wanless review into the handling of allegations of child abuse by prominent figures has found that any evidence of records removed or destroyed, has been removed or destroyed.

“We could find no evidence of records having been destroyed,” said Richard Whittam QC, one of the report’s authors.

“But let’s be realistic, if you’re in the business of destroying records then you’re obviously going to destroy the evidence that you’ve destroyed the records.”

“I mean, Duh!” He added.

Members of the public were sceptical at the result of the review.

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“Well obviously they’re not going to find evidence of something that’s been destroyed,” said Paul Morris, a four year-old from Chelmsford, Essex.

“I mean, it’s been destroyed, hasn’t it?”

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Responding to the report, the Home Secretary Theresa May spoke of her relieve at the findings.

She told reporters, “Right, brilliant, well that’s all cleared up then and there’s definitely no cause for concern about any public figure’s behaviour in response to these allegations at the time.”

Labour have called for an enquiry into the destruction of evidence that evidence has been destroyed.

The enquiry is expected to reveal that although there is no evidence that evidence of the destruction of evidence has been destroyed, the probable reason for that lack of evidence is that it’s been destroyed.