Monday 11 March 2013 by Formelia Alberthine

I thought sharks were already well protected, insist Wonga customers

As sharks were given new protections from fishermen, Wonga customers have admitted they thought that all types of life-limiting sharks were already given unprecedented levels of protection.

Wonga, a short-term lending agency whose representative APR is 4214%, claim their service is a fast and effective way for poor people to borrow cash and simultaneously become even poorer.

A spokeswoman for the company, Sheila Mount, claimed they needed no further protection.

“What protection could a company making such gargantuan profits off the misery of others, possibly wish for?”

“Even more poor people? Pah – there are already more than enough of those shit-forsaken reprobates to get through.”

“George Osborne is literally throwing them over-board at such a rate we can scarcely keep up.”

“He is the only protection we need.”

Shark protection

Wonga customer, Hilary Pent, agreed the company required little more protection than that already extended to them by the Financial Standards Authority.

“I didn’t even realise that loan sharks were endangered, but it does seem the FSA are bending over backwards to help them thrive in today’s difficult environment.”

“They’re such an altruistic organisation, aren’t they?”

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