Friday 1 March 2013

Vatican officials caught swiftly removing Justin Bieber posters from official Pope residence

As Benedict XVIs reign as Pope came to an end, Vatican officials moved quickly to remove traces of the former Pope’s taste in decor.

Just moments after he retired, Vatican cleaners were seen leaving with boxes of posters featuring Canadian pop star Justin Bieber, mostly in his younger days.

A Vatican insider told us, “Benedict has had those posters up since Justin made his debut track in 2009. He was a 15 year-old boy at the time, so there was nothing unusual about that in this organisation.”

“It certainly didn’t raise any eyebrows, except amongst the music fans in here.”

“But Christ almighty, the music he’s listen to. People don’t seem to realise this is the main issue with Papal infallibility.  If the Pope says that Justin Bieber is a musical genius, then he’s a musical genius. End of story.”

“Do you know what ‘Baby Baby’ sounds like when sung by a choir raised on Gregorian chanting? Not bad actually, but that’s not the point!”

Pope retires

The former Pope has begun his new life as ‘Benny’ this morning, and is already enjoying wearing jeans and a hoody.

Our insider continued, “It’s been refreshing to see him lose his infallibility, and this week’s Vatican pub quiz will be interesting, seeing as he’s used to getting every answer right, whether he actually knew it or not.”

“I might see if he fancies a little wager before he realises he doesn’t have fake super powers any more.”

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