Benitez installed as favourite for BBC Sports Split Personality of the the year

author avatar by 11 years ago

Chelsea interim manager Rafa Benitez has been installed by bookmakers as the favourite for the newly created BBC Sports Split-Personality of the year award.

The move comes after his post-match outburst following his side’s 2-0 FA Cup victory over Middlesborough.

The Spaniard, famed for a brand of football so cautious, he once tried to sign a lolli-pop lady to safely usher his charges into the opposition’s half of the pitch, claimed the club made a ‘huge’ mistake in calling him ‘interim’ manager.

“Installing me in the first place was a signal to the players that they had about as much chance of having a successful end to the season as bringing the missus to the Christmas party and not seeing her end up on the short end of John Terry,” he told reporters.

“What was Roman thinking?”

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“Sacking your Champions League winning manager is one thing, but compounding that error by calling me interim manager instead of ‘failed applicant’, is an even bigger error of judgement.”

“My CV reads like a promiscuous harlot who has failed to bring several blue-balled clients to climax.”

BBC Sports Split Personality Award

A BBC Press Officer, Sheila Mount, confirmed the creation of the new award, suggesting the old format had ran its course.

“Any award for a ‘personality’ that sees Andy Murray rock up third, is clearly, and fundamentally, flawed.”

“A bit like Benitez.”

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