Wednesday 6 February 2013 by Gary Stanton

Pippa Middleton refusing to deny ‘relationship’ with Richard III

Social climber Pippa Middleton is reportedly in the tentative stages of a relationship with King Richard III after a facial reconstruction revealed the former monarch to be a ‘bit of a dish’.

Middleton, 29, is keen to rejoin the dating scene after failing to secure the affections of Prince Harry and has been seen staring wistfully at portraits of the King ever since he was unearthed.

Indeed such is the lure of a place in the royal family, the society girl is prepared to overlook the King’s various shortcomings such as his lack of a pulse or any major functioning organs.

And according to dating experts, the society girl is unlikely to be the first of her kind to find love in a car park.

Pippa and Richard III

The King has thus far maintained a dignified silence over the rumours and is clearly playing his cards close to his exposed ribcage.

But historians claim that although the King spent much of his time feasting and fighting, he also had an eye for a nice arse.

Richard was 32 at the time of his death at the Battle of Bosworth -just three years older than Pippa, making him the ideal age.

Royal Correspondent Jenny Mills told us ‘The King is surely conscious of the fact that their relationship might kick up a bit of a stink.”

Middleton, meanwhile, has been accused of being fussy after insisting that the man she calls ‘Richy 3’ receives a full body reconstruction before taking things to the next level.

Last night sister Kate said, “They don’t want to rush things but she’s obviously got the hots for him.”

“Although it could just be smallpox.”

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