Thursday 15 November 2012

Jockeys know how to party

Small people who ride horses for a living, really know how to have a good time, it has emerged.

After leading small horse rider Frankie Dettori was found to have traces of a non performance-enhancing substance in his system, the only available conclusion is that he was busy getting off his tits.

Equine analyst Sheila Williams explained, “Anyone who goes to work in a brightly coloured silk costume to work obviously loves the rich man’s aspirin.”

“Plus, you only have to look at a jockey to realise that because of their small stature they can get crazy high for less than a fiver – and for that money, who wouldn’t?”

Dettori drug test

Fans of the sport have spoken out in support of Frankie Dettori, insisting that being a party animal is part and parcel of being a jockey.

As one explained, “If the tests show he was nose-drunk, or just smoking some hippy lettuce, then I don’t think you should blame him – maybe you should blame all the other people at the incredible party he must have been at.”

Another said,”I don’t know why you’re surprised. The man spent three years as a captain on Question of Sport – that should have been a warning sign – you simply don’t do that sober.”

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