As football fans all over the country took turns in criticising the omission of their club’s players from England’s Euro 2012 squad, friends of Steve Harris, who has scored 228 goals in his local 5-a-side league, have slammed the decision to overlook the in-form striker.
“The four strikers in the squad have 52 goals between them this season, Steve scored that many in a week when we had back to back games against Old Man Unathletic.”, said Harris’ best friend and strike partner in the Joe’s kebab shop Daventry 5-a-side league.
“Plus, if you take into account that Rooney is suspended for the first two games, and conveniently ignore the fact that Walcott can play up front, there are only three strikers. One of who is Andy Carroll who doesn’t really count.”
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Some fans have defended Hodgson’s decision to include Carroll, pointing out that the Liverpool forward has hit form at just the right time after putting in a couple of good performances at the end of the season.
But those who supported Harris’ selection have pointed out that he too finished the season strongly, scoring 32 goals in his last two matches.
“Steve would have offered something different to the squad, he’s got two good feet, is quicker than he looks, and international defenders won’t be used to playing against a 19 stone lorry driver who likes a fag with his warm up.”
The one thing that everybody does seem to be able to agree on, regardless of which team they support, is that Stuart Downing should not be in the squad.