Monday 3 October 2011 by Spacey

No rise in council tax for all those reduced services, promises Osborne

Chancellor George Osborne has revealed how he intends to help families and pensioners by allowing them to pay the same amount of council tax as before for services that no longer exist.

Mr Osborne told BBC Radio 4’s Today programme that he expected families to be overwhelmed with gratitude when they discover that they will be paying exactly the same amount of council tax as last year even though numerous services have been cut.

“The fact that we are enabling councils to not charge extra for services that aren’t there anymore highlights how committed we are to giving families a whole lot less, but at no extra cost,” he said.

People throughout the UK have already begun excitedly trying to decide what they will do with the £72 a year saving that they didn’t even have in the first place.

No council tax rise

“It’s brilliant news,” enthused 37 year old John Watkins from Nuneaton punching the air in celebration.

“No scrimping for us this year, we’re going to have a Christmas to remember.”

“I’ve had sleepless nights wondering how we were going to make ends meet, but having the burden of what equates to just over 20p a day lifted off my shoulders has really put a spring in my step.”

“Gawd bless the Tories! Every last one of ’em.”

“Yes, of course I’m being bloody sarcastic!”

Coalition arseholes t-shirt

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