Monday 26 September 2011

Tiger Woods hires new wingman

Following an unsuccessful return to the club circuit, Golfer Tiger Woods has announced the hiring of Joe LaCava as his new long term wing man.

Woods has struggled since his almost year-long absence, and sees LaCava’s experience as key to getting back to the top of his game.

LaCava joins at a time when Woods’ standing in the game has never been lower, with below par performances regularly witnessed, even with mid-level cocktail waitresses.

He told reporters, “I’m extremely excited to be working with Tiger, obviously.  Everyone in the world knows what he is capable of, and I’m very much looking forward to helping him get the most out of his obvious talents.”

“I know my role well, and I expect we’ll have tremendous success in the years to come.”

A source close to Tiger told us, “Tiger knew Joe was the wing-man for him when he successfully ran interference on a cock-blocker at a Las Vegas club a few weeks ago.  He was a natural.”

Woods’ new wingman

Experts suggest that 2012 could be the year of Tiger Woods, with a clean sweep of all clubs and VIP rooms across the world.

“LaCava has a great knowledge of the game, he knows how to run interference, and isn’t afraid to jump on the odd grenade.”

“A willingness to take one for the team by taking out the fat-chick like that is hard to find.”

“They’re going to clean up, I guarantee it.”

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