If you strike, people will have as little respect for you as I do, Gove warns teachers

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Education secretary Michael Gove has warned teachers that if they go ahead with strike action they run the risk of people viewing them with the same level of contempt as he does.

Mr Gove insisted that the planned strikes would cause anger amongst those parents that view teachers purely as free childminders for several hours of each day.

He told reporters, “People with no long-term interest in their child’s education will be extremely angry if teachers go ahead with strikes.”

“Their belief that a teacher’s working day finishes when the bell rings at 3 o’clock and my use of the word ‘militancy’ will be certain to get them suitably worked up.”

“Also, if teachers could all start wearing donkey jackets to work it would make this whole process a bit easier for me.”

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Gove on strikes

Mr Gove also backed plans for parents, who have absolutely no experience of handling large groups of children, helping out to ensure that schools stay open.

“I think it’s a great idea,” he enthused. “People who haven’t got the first clue what they’re doing are exactly the sort of people we’ll be attracting to the profession once the pension reforms have gone through.”

“I’m not even sure why we’re limiting it to parents to be honest.  If you’re a middle-aged man who fancies spending several hours in the company of young children who will be told to do what you say, get in touch.”

“I’m sure this whole process will give people a glimpse of what’s to come.”

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