Government performs U-turn on plans to reform U-turns

author avatar by 13 years ago

The coalition government has revealed plans for radical changes to the way that it continually changes its mind.

Speaking at a Downing Street press conference, Prime Minister David Cameron revealed how all decisions that the government made would now be subject to review by a panel consisting of readers of The Sun newspaper.

Mr Cameron said that the government had concluded it would “not be right” to push ahead with decisions that didn’t have the backing of taxi drivers and people that spend their entire lives in betting shops.

Reacting to criticism that the government’s recent U-turn on the sentencing of criminals was a sign of an indecisive government, the prime minister said: “I make no apology for listening to the views of Sun readers,”

“We have listened to their concerns and are currently looking into the feasibility of castrating shoplifters.”

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U-turn on U-turns

The prime minister also revealed that the government’s planned changes to teachers’ pensions were also being reviewed by Sun readers.

“I think our decision to make teachers work longer, pay more and receive less has been completely vindicated by revelations that teachers work short hours and get really, really long holidays.”

“As for people claiming disability allowance! Don’t get me started.” he tutted.

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