We’re not trying to kill Gaddafi on purpose, but by accident, confirm Allied Forces

author avatar by 13 years ago

The Allied Forces currently operational in Libya have revealed that they are not intentionally trying to kill Col Gaddafi, but are in fact hoping that if they bomb the shit out of absolutely everything then eventually they’ll kill him by accident.

The Prime Minister has approved the sending of four Apache attack helicopters to the mission in Libya, allowing for swifter attacks on a wider range of smaller targets that aren’t as yet engulfed in flames or a pile of rubble.

“We can’t stress enough that allied forces are not actively seeking to kill Gaddafi,” insisted a Downing Street spokesman.

“If he does happen to be killed by the millions of pounds worth of weaponry currently being fired at Libya, then that will be absolutely and completely unintentional!”

Gaddafi not a target, sort of

The US and France have also revealed their determination to “finish the job” in Libya, with France also deploying helicopters in the hope of not intentionally killing the Libyan leader.

NewsThump Best sellers

US President Barack Obama said, “Our objective is to stop Gaddafi from directing his forces of aggression against the Libyan people.”

“We have heard that he is on the run, paranoid and possibly hiding in Tripoli hospitals in the belief that he’ll be safe there.”

“I can promise that when it comes to the allied forces accidentally blowing things up – nowhere is safe.”

NewsThump Hoodies