IPCC praises false arrest police officers for ‘excellent teamwork’

author avatar by 13 years ago

After the alleged collusion of three officers to falsely arrest a tuition fees protester, the IPCC has praised the way the officers were able to  ignore their training and work effectively as a team towards a common goal.

Metropolitan Police management are keen to speak to the three officers about how they managed to work so well together to arrest an innocent protester, when they should have been busy being given the run around by a group of unruly teenagers like the rest of the force.

Met spokesman Saul Mee was adamant the force should look closely at their obviously effective working practises.

“We can learn a lesson here, definitely.  And that lesson is about team-work, and what can be achieved when everyone works together and pulls in the same direction.”

“We know the Met doesn’t provide the best environment if you want to work effectively and efficiently, but these officers ignored all that and did a brilliant job fitting up that student.”

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“If nothing else, this incident should show all policemen and a women exactly what is possible when you work together and put your mind to it.”

IPCC investigate false arrest

Experts have lauded the officers’ efforts, claiming the spirit of initiative is alive and well in a force otherwise constrained by bureaucracy and red tape.

Lecturer in Effective Communication Dave Walters told us, “What we have here is a situation where the officers were properly motivated to communicate effectively with each other, and we can all see the results such behaviour has delivered.”

“What we need are procedures in place that allow all officers to work in this way, only preferably without the threat of prison hanging over them.”

Mr Mee said that although technically the arrest might not have been legitimate, he had limited sympathy with the victim.

“He was definitely there, ‘present’ shall we say, and although he hadn’t been witnessed conducting a crime of any sort, the odds are he’d probably done something naughty earlier in the day.”

“Shouting stuff, probably.”

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