George Lucas has announced that he will be re-releasing the entire Star Wars Saga in a Special Collectors Edition Boxset of Special Collectors Editions, with previously unseen footage that wasn’t deemed interesting enough for any of the previous fifteen releases.
The news will be a blow to fans of the series that have already spent vast quantities of money on the Special Collection of Collectors Editions and the Special Edition of Special collections Edition, the one with commentary from George Lucas’ cleaner.
“I’ve already built an extension to house all the re-released repackaged special edition collectors boxsets that have been released so far,” Explained Star Wars devotee Phillip Howe.
“I could try and resist buying the latest, but I’ve heard it comes with a free plastic cup with a picture of someone that once stood in a lift with the guy who played Chewbacca.”
“I’m just really hoping this latest version doesn’t also make me think Jar Jar Binks was created by a simpleton racist.”
Star Wars re-release
Lucas has revealed that the boxset, which will be a limited edition of just 25 million copies, gives fans the opportunity to view all 6 parts in a way they’ve never been able to before.
“This is very exciting,” he enthused. “Not only will it allow fans to watch all six episodes in the traditional start-to-finish manner, they will now be able to watch it backwards too.”
“New technology that we’ve developed called UpsideDown-o-vision will also allow them to watch the action as if they were standing on their head.”
“It will also come with some glasses that allow the viewer to watch the action blurred, recreating the experience of someone who was watching the film with really bad eyesight, a bit like Yoda. Yes, we’re calling it Yoda-vision.”
“No, I didn’t just make that up.”