Abortions now more popular than Meerkats warn ProLife Alliance

author avatar by 13 years ago

Pro-life groups have warned that women are getting pregnant just so they can have an abortion after insisting the first UK television advertisement by an abortion advisory organisation absolutely convinced all women they simply must have one.

The Advertising Standards Authority received 1054 complaints about the advert from the sort of people who believe everything they see on television, and are convinced that baby Jesus will cry because an abortion will now become the season’s must-have accessory among teenage girls.

However, the complaints have been dismissed because the adverts don’t mention or advocate abortion and the complainants are, for the most part, arseholes.

The ProLife Alliance said it was outraged at the ASA’s decision, with a spokesperson saying, “Absolutely everywhere I go I hear people saying the adverts slogan ‘Are YOU late?’. It’s getting really annoying.”

Mary Stopes

The ProLife Alliance’s claims that the advert actively encouraged women to have abortions has been disputed, but some women were impressed with the adverts.

One woman stood waiting for a bus said, “I’d never really considered having an abortion, but I liked the advert and would certainly consider getting pregnant so I could have one.”

Another told us, “I’ve been saving for a pair of Ugg Boots, but now I’m wondering if I should get an abortion instead.  It’s so difficult to choose.”

“Hahahah, abortions, simples, hahaha!” Laughed another, walking in the park with her young children.

Marie Stopes defended the advert and said it had received an “overwhelmingly positive” response to the ad.

“Things are going great! We’re thinking of introducing gift vouchers and possibly a Buy One Get One Free offer.”

“It’s just a shame that pro-life so often corresponds to ‘pro-religious zealot intent on ruining it for everyone’.”