Alonso celebrates his greatest fixed Formula One victory so far

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Ferrari driver Fernando Alonso last night hailed his Formula One victory at Hockenheim as the greatest fixed result of his career, far outshining his manufactured victory for Renault in the 2008 season.

Alonso told reporters after the race, “This is a great day for me in my career.  The fixed victory for Renault at Singapore in 2008 has hung over me for more than two years as the prime example of me benefiting from a team that cheats.”

“But now we have another tainted victory, in the red of Ferrari, which will finally put the Renault incident to bed once and for all.”

“I am delighted that in the future when when people talk about cheating your way to a race victory they will picture Fernando Alonso in the red of the Scuderia Ferrari rather than Alonso in the overalls of Renault.  It is where this team needs to be.”

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Alonso won after Ferrari’s other driver Felipe Massa slowed to let him past following a coded instruction on his radio that was so discreet it was deciphered by every single member of the viewing public, even those who did not speak English.

Unfortunately, the rules of Formula One strictly prohibit team orders, in the sense of the word ‘strictly’ that means someone shakes a fist at you and takes your pocket money as punishment, and so Ferrari were fined $100,000 with the race result standing.

A Ferrari spokesperson said, “$100,000 seems fair.  So we’ve already set aside the $800,000 needed to allows us to fix the remainder of the races so that Alonso can have the best chance of winning the title.”

Former driver Martin Brundle said, “It will be interesting to see how Ferrari will top this latest rule-breaking performance.”

“There are so few avenues left to them if they want to break the rules without being disqualified, and so it makes the rest of the season absolutely intriguing.”