A terribly attractive 22 year-old woman has successfully climbed something or other, becoming the sexiest British woman ever to do so, according to reports in just about every newspaper.
22 year old Bonita Norris, a stunning blond from Wokingham, apparently trained really hard to do something that is really quite difficult, and was ultimately successful in doing so, according to the press.
As one former tabloid editor told us, “It’s our job to tell you when a beautiful person does something. And let me tell you, the something that she did was almost certainly amazing!”
Example headlines covering the story read, “Look at this hot woman, she has done something!” with another exclaiming, “Cor blimey! Smoking hot woman does something to do with climbing. Cor!”
One reader explained, “Man, she’s so hot. Look at all these photos in which she looks really hot. I’m sure the climbing thing she was totally awesome, too.”
There has been criticism that the press are only providing blanket coverage of Ms Norris’ achievement (Ms? Is she single then? – Ed) because of the way she looks, and not the fact that she is the youngest British woman to successfully climb Mount Everest.
Paul Dacre, Editor of the Daily Mail responded by saying, “That’s utter rubbish – we’re celebrating her achievement. The fact that she is so easy on the eye is a pure coincidence.”
“Just a couple of weeks ago a teenager from the US became the youngest person EVER to climb Everest, I’m sure you all know exactly what he looks like, right? Right? Oh.”