World

‘Is any child safe online?’ asks Daily Mail, as web team upload photos of celebrity child in bikini

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The Internet publishing team at the Daily Mail are refusing to let their own front page story about child grooming overshadow a cracking photo of Harper Beckham in a bikini.

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Chuckling ghost of John McCain punts another Trump golf ball into the lake

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The late Republican Senator, John McCain, is having a whale of a time in the afterlife.

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Donald Trump becomes first person in nine years to use Bing search engine

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Microsoft has expressed delight today at the news that someone has used their search engine, even if it was the half-witted President of America.

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Theresa May hoping to secure lucrative trade deal with Nigerian Prince

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Theresa May is hoping to use her trip Nigeria today to firm up the details of a lucrative low-risk deal with a Prince she has been in email correspondence with over recent months.

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Theresa May’s dancing replaces Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen as the worst thing ever filmed

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Theresa May’s attempts at dancing are just about worse than the second (third if you count the brilliant animated original from the 80s) Transformers movie.

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Pope confirms that Guinness tastes better in Dublin

Pope Guinness hat in Ireland

The Pope has concluded his visit to Ireland and issued an official Catholic Church proclamation to the effect that Guinness tastes better in Dublin.

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I coloured the Stars and Stripes in Russia’s colours because I’m colourblind, insists Donald Trump

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Donald Trump has been criticised for colouring in an American flag to resemble what it would look like if the country was under Russian rule.

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I prefer my war heroes not dead, scoffs Donald Trump

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As America unites in grief over the loss of a great politician and man, Donald Trump has said that John McCain can’t be that great as he hasn’t managed to stay alive.

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‘Trump can have the jail cell he had put aside for me if you like’ Hillary Clinton tells prosecutors

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Hillary Clinton has offered Donald Trump the room that he had previously promised that he would put her in.

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Planet Earth to search for better deal by switching away from the Sun as main energy provider

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Planet Earth is planning to switch from using the Sun as its energy supplier, in order to get a better deal on its fuel bills.

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