World

NewsThump barred from White House Press Pool

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British satirical website NewsThump has been banned from the White House Press Pool after press secretary Sean Spicer accused them of pushing ‘false narratives’ and ‘fake news’.

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Armed ‘Lavatory Marshals’ to be introduced to protect people from transexuals

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Every public restroom in the United States will have an armed ‘lavatory marshal’ to protect people from transexuals under proposals unveiled today.

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Donald Trump pretty sure he’s signed an Executive Order banning Transformers

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Donald Trump has signed an Executive Order which he believes will put an end to the politically correct policies of lefty do-gooder Optimus Prime.

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President Trump pre-emptively bans immigrants from newly discovered planets that may harbour life

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The Trump administration in the US has reacted to the discovery of potentially habitable planets in the Trappist-1 system by banning anyone who lives there from visiting the US.

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Facebook outage leaves millions frantically searching for what friends had for breakfast

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Millions of people across the world were left in complete ignorance of what friends and family had for breakfast this morning after Facebook suffered an outage.

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President Trump appoints Captain America as new National Security Advisor

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President Trump has surprised Washington by appointing World War II veteran and artificially enhanced super soldier Captain America to replace Michael Flynn as his new National Security Advisor.

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Suicide bomber shortage means ISIS now offering 80 virgins in the afterlife

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A series of defeats mean that Islamic terror organisations are offering ever-increasing numbers of virgins in the afterlife to drum up interest.

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Fox News confirmed as US Director of National Intelligence

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After being cited by Donald Trump as the source for his claim of a terror attack in Sweden, Fox News have been confirmed as Director of National Intelligence.

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Builders impressed by Donald Trump’s inability to build a wall on time

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Builders across the UK have been inspired by Donald Trump not starting some building work a month after he promised he would.

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Sweden offers to show Donald Trump how to build a cabinet

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Sweden has taken pity on Donald Trump and provided easy to follow instruction on how to build a cabinet.

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