UK

Welsh FA confirms lookalike will cover for Ryan Giggs during friendly Internationals

Thumbnail image for Welsh FA confirms lookalike will cover for Ryan Giggs during friendly Internationals

The Welsh FA has announced that Ryan Giggs’ contract allows him to maintain his ongoing apathy towards friendly internationals.

Read the full article →

Melania Trump “f*cking delighted” that Donald won’t be dying anytime soon

Thumbnail image for Melania Trump “f*cking delighted” that Donald won’t be dying anytime soon

Melania Trump is properly thrilled to hear of the President’s “excellent health”.

Read the full article →

New Minister of Loneliness immediately assigned to 61-year-old female Downing Street resident

Thumbnail image for New Minister of Loneliness immediately assigned to 61-year-old female Downing Street resident

A new government minister, appointed to tackle the problems faced by those who have become detached from society has been assigned to look after Theresa May, a 61-year-old Prime Minister from London.

Read the full article →

Middle-aged man’s attempt at a fist bump ends in minor injury

Thumbnail image for Middle-aged man’s attempt at a fist bump ends in minor injury

A man in his late forties had a go at fist bump and everyone wishes he hadn’t.

Read the full article →

Macron agrees to lend Britain a giant tapestry of French blokes kicking the shit out of Englishmen

Thumbnail image for Macron agrees to lend Britain a giant tapestry of French blokes kicking the shit out of Englishmen

In a move seen by many as an olive branch to Theresa May’s government, the French president has allowed the unprecedented loan of the Bayeux tapestry, a medieval masterpiece commemorating the decisive victory inflicted by a young charismatic French leader over squabbling Saxon lords.

Read the full article →

‘Joining our party makes you a fanny magnet’, claims UKIP

Thumbnail image for ‘Joining our party makes you a fanny magnet’, claims UKIP

If there’s one thing that turns a man into a fanny magnet it’s being a senior member of UKIP, according to reports today.

Read the full article →

Theresa May takes credit for chimps evolving into humans

Thumbnail image for Theresa May takes credit for chimps evolving into humans

Following news that Theresa May has taken credit for an EU directive to ban credit card charges, she has now made the claim that the evolution of chimps into humans happened as a direct result of Tory government policy.

Read the full article →

EU left reeling as delegation of British MPs meet Michel Barnier without trying some pathetic media stunt

Thumbnail image for EU left reeling as delegation of British MPs meet Michel Barnier without trying some pathetic media stunt

Brussels was set abuzz yesterday as a cross-party group of Remain MPs met Michel Barnier but did not invite the press to a cringe-worthy display of jingoism designed to placate senescent tabloid readers in Berkshire.

Read the full article →

Man so posh he eats fruit even when he’s not ill

Thumbnail image for Man so posh he eats fruit even when he’s not ill

31-year-old Simon Williams has been accused of ‘swank’ after eating a piece of fresh fruit despite not being unwell today.

Read the full article →

Woman who magically found £1bn to save her own job unable to find anything to save 20,000 jobs

Thumbnail image for Woman who magically found £1bn to save her own job unable to find anything to save 20,000 jobs

A woman who magically found £1bn of taxpayer money in order to save her own job has admitted she’s struggling to find the government money required to save 20,000 jobs.

Read the full article →