UK

“Didn’t he do well?” says everybody

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Sir Bruce Forsyth has died at the age of 89, leading everyone to remark on a hell of a career.

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BBC Newsnight provides glimpse of a Trumpian Britain by allowing fictional rabid bigot to host

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In a chilling thought experiment, Newsnight created a vision of a right-wing dystopia by having their current affairs flagship presented by “Nick Ferrari”, a grotesque pastiche of loudmouth populists.

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LinkedIn now 100% dickhead

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LinkedIn has become the world’s first 100% dickhead social network after a pleasant man called Kevin finally worked out how to delete his account.

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Littlehampton branch of Wimpy misses out on Good Food Guide restaurant of the year yet again

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There was disappointment in Littlehampton as their Wimpy restaurant on the High Street missed out being named the Good Food Guide restaurant of the year yet again.

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Staunch egalitarian Sarah Champion distances herself from notorious race-baiter Sarah Champion

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In a sudden decision, Shadow Equalities Minister Sarah Champion has resigned over an article published in The Sun by foul Islamophobe Sarah Champion.

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Daily Mail celebrates ‘Barely legal sexy girls getting exam results’ day

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The Daily Mail is today celebrating the one day of the year where they can ask attractive eighteen-year-old girls to pose for photos without feeling at all seedy because it is A-Level results day.

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Walnut Whips to be renamed Brexit Whips

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Walnut Whips are to be rebranded to indicate their impoverished nut-free status.

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You need to spend £44k on a decent washroom when you have this much blood on your hands, claims Jeremy Hunt

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Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt has defended the cost of his new £44,000 washroom, insisting that sometimes he just can’t wash the blood clean off his hands.

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You can’t put a price on sovereignty, say people who won’t live long enough to pay for it

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Leaving the EU is all about British sovereignty and mere economics should have nothing to do with it, according to various elderly UKIP supporters living off final salary pensions in large houses in the Home Counties.

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Co-worker inexplicably thinks you’re interested in hearing about their commute

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A man whose commute takes him through London Waterloo seems to think you’re interested in hearing all about it today.

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