UK

Subbuteo to sue Liverpool defence for copyright infringement

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Subbuteo are to sue the entire Liverpool back four for copyright infringement following their performance during their 3-0 home defeat to West Ham.

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2015 shittest year on record

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2015 is shaping up to be the shittest year since records began, according to experts.

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Teen with noisy moped seemingly oblivious to being universally despised

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Local teen and moped owner Simon Williams remains seemingly oblivious to the utter contempt with which he is held by his neighbours, according to sources this morning.

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Facebook auto-play videos criticised after people accidentally see George Osborne

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The video auto-play feature on Facebook has been slammed after thousands accidentally saw a video featuring George Osborne.

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Pet shop sued after Golden Retriever fails to retrieve any gold

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A man is to sue his local pet shop after the Golden Retriever they sold him failed to retrieve any gold.

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2380 people who died after being declared ‘fit to work’ would be reconsidered for benefits, says IDS

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Iain Duncan Smith has said that the thousands of people who have died after being declared ‘fit to work’ will be allowed to reapply for sickness benefits.

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David Cameron’s dog to be made Lord

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The list of new appointments to the House of Lords has been released and features a heavy bias towards supporters of the Prime Minister, most notably; his dog.

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Stop making personal attacks on those other twats, says Corbyn

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Labour leadership hopeful Jeremy Corbyn has told his supporters to stop making personal attacks on those other twats he’s up against this week.

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Let’s focus on those declared ‘fit for work’ who are still alive, insists DWP

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After 2,380 people died within two weeks of being found fit for work, the Department for Work and Pensions said we should instead focus on those still alive.

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Conservatives announce plans to privatise the Labour Party

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The government is to privatise the Labour Party, they have announced today.

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