UK

Disappointment as GDPR won’t prevent mother-in-law from contacting you

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Your mother-in-law can still legally annoy the crap out of you despite the introduction of GDPR, millions of disappointed husbands have learned today.

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Boris Johnson tricks Russian pranksters into believing he’s a credible politician

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Russian pranksters were left red-faced yesterday after they spent an 18-minute phone call thinking they were playing a joke on a credible, respected politician when, in reality, they were talking to Boris Johnson.

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Man successfully unsubscribes from a decade’s worth of shit emails by doing f*ck all

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A man has successfully unsubscribed from a colossal volume of shit emails by simply sitting on his arse and ignoring the begging emails as they came in.

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David Davis hoping showing up to Brexit negotiations without any trousers on is just a dream

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David Davis is sitting opposite Michael Barnier without any trousers on today and hoping with all his might that this is just a dream.

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Man who can’t grow a proper beard to seek counselling

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A fully grown male is clutching at straws in an attempt to overcome the crippling feeling of inadequacy that not being able to grow a beard has brought him.

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Company that cares deeply about your privacy keen to keep using your details to sell you stuff

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A company that claims to value your private details above all else, is keen to keep using those private details about you to try and sell you stuff, it has emerged this morning.

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Every man, woman, and child a saboteur engaged in plot to overthrow Brexit, claims Daily Mail

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Leading ‘newspaper’ The Daily Mail has revealed that literally everyone in Britain is a saboteur, plotting to halt the Brexit they hold so dear.

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£900 per year cut in household income ‘a great start’ claim leading Brexiters

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Leading Brexiters are today celebrating following the Governor of the Bank of England’s announcement that every household in the UK has seen a reduction of £900 per year in their income from where it should be, hailing it as “a great start” but agreeing more needs to be done.

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M&S employees promised ‘not just any redundancy’

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With the news today that a number of Marks and Spencer shops are to close 100 shops by 2022, senior management have assured staff that their redundancy will be something special.

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Loathsome EU bastards determined to deprive hardworking Brits of dirty air

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Meddling eurocrats are seeking to clean the air inside the UK in the latest display of their frightening power.

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