Technology

Water on Mars already better than in most Spanish hotels

Thumbnail image for Water on Mars already better than in most Spanish hotels

The European Space Agency has announced that water on Mars is already of a better quality than you’d get from a tap in any Spanish hotel.

Read the full article →

Elon Musk’s hyperloop to revolutionise public transport for nonces

Thumbnail image for Elon Musk’s hyperloop to revolutionise public transport for nonces

Elon Musk’s revolutionary hyperloop transport system could enable nonces to travel great distances to find their prey, according to experts.

Read the full article →

Mark Zuckerberg hospitalised after dangerously prolonged laughing fit following ICO fine

Thumbnail image for Mark Zuckerberg hospitalised after dangerously prolonged laughing fit following ICO fine

One of Silicon Valley’s most illustrious entrepreneurs suffered a collapsed lung and two fractured ribs after the announcement of the Information Commissioner’s Office fine of £500K led the billionaire to collapse on the floor in a fit of prolonged hysterical laughter.

Read the full article →

Germany celebrates as VAR appeal sees them retrospectively awarded 1966 World Cup

Thumbnail image for Germany celebrates as VAR appeal sees them retrospectively awarded 1966 World Cup

German fans are celebrating today after a VAR appeal led to Geoff Hurst’s second goal in the 1966 World Cup being disallowed.

Read the full article →

FIFA unveils VARVAR system to review controversial VAR decisions

Thumbnail image for FIFA unveils VARVAR system to review controversial VAR decisions

Following a spate of controversial Video Assistant Referee decisions at the World Cup, FIFA has unveiled VARVAR – a Video Assistant Referee Video Assistant Referee system, whereby a referee in a remote location watches a video feed of the VAR room and is able to review and overrule any game-changing VAR decisions.

Read the full article →

£5000 sex robot runs off with Henry Hoover

Thumbnail image for £5000 sex robot runs off with Henry Hoover

A sophisticated fuck-puppet has done one with a vacuum cleaner.

Read the full article →

Man following extremely beautiful women on Instagram purely for the inspirational quotes

Thumbnail image for Man following extremely beautiful women on Instagram purely for the inspirational quotes

Simon Williams, 31, of North London who follows multiple extremely attractive Instagram models on Instagram, today revealed he only did so because of their inspirational quotes.

Read the full article →

Donald Trump appoints plucky newcomer Anakin Skywalker as head of Space Force

Thumbnail image for Donald Trump appoints plucky newcomer Anakin Skywalker as head of Space Force

Donald Trump has made his wisest appointment yet.

Read the full article →

Woman who wrote ‘hahahahahaha’ on WhatsApp didn’t even laugh once

Thumbnail image for Woman who wrote ‘hahahahahaha’ on WhatsApp didn’t even laugh once

A woman on a train has been seen writing ‘hahahahahaha’ on a WhatsApp conversation, but according to witnesses, didn’t actually didn’t even laugh once.

Read the full article →

Donald Trump announces new ‘Space Force’ will operate from giant spherical space station

Thumbnail image for Donald Trump announces new ‘Space Force’ will operate from giant spherical space station

President Trump has revealed that the ‘space force’ which he has instructed the Department of Defense to create will operate from a massive spherical space station, capable of destroying an entire planet.

Read the full article →