Technology

Man who doesn’t care what you think keeps logging in to tell you so

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A man who sincerely doesn’t care what you think in an Internet debate has logged in eight times and counting to tell you so.

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“Who the hell has got my phone?” demands a furious Donald Trump

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After a series of reasonable and articulate statements appeared on his Twitter feed, Donald Trump has furiously demanded to know who the hell has got his phone.

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Dieters told the most effective weight-loss method remains Photoshop

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The easiest way to lose weight and keep it off is with photoshop, according to a report published today.

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Stephen Hawking to replace wheelchair with gigantic golden throne and send his mind into the Warp

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Stephen Hawking wants to replace his wheelchair with a golden throne and send his mind into the Warp, according to a funding proposal submitted today.

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Man who corrects factual errors in Internet jokes still inexplicably single

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A man who uses the comments threads of Internet jokes to correct factual errors still hopes one day to know the touch of a woman, according to people who know him.

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The iPhone has made the world a better place, insists man who spends life constantly glued to small black screen

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It is ten years since the release of the iPhone, a device which has made the world a better place according to a man who spends every waking moment glued to the screen of one.

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New robot Queen convinces on first public appearance

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The new Queen robot or ‘RoboQueen’ made a convincing debut in public yesterday with a visit to church at Sandringham.

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My dad works for a secret department at Sony and we have a PS8 in the attic, claims boy

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A child has broken the confidentiality agreement imposed on him by Sony’s legal department to reveal that his dad is not, as widely believed, an unemployable layabout – but is actually a maverick games scientist and they have a PS8 in the attic.

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Donald Trump to prevent automation of jobs by deporting robots to Mexico

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President-elect Donald Trump has pledged to prevent American jobs being automated by deporting robots to Mexico.

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December 2015 wakes up in the shower

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In a stunning last-minute plot twist, December 2015 has woken up in the shower revealing everything that happened in the last 12 months to have been just a dream.

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