Technology

Dozens killed as clashes between rival Android and Apple fans escalate

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Dozens of technology users have been killed with hundreds more injured as fighting escalated amongst rival technology factions last night.

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Apple Watch to finally make eye-contact obsolete

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Apple’s new smart Watch will make the process of looking up at the world around you completely obsolete, according to Apple CEO Tim Cook.

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Katie Price changes Apple iCloud password to ‘password’

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The latest iCloud leaked celebrity photo revelation has come from Katie Price who told reporters today that she has changed her password to ‘password’, due to a lack of interest in her photos.

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iCloud empty

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iCloud has been completely emptied of all photos by Apple product owners, it emerged this afternoon.

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#IceBucketChallenge is stupid, claims man without any nominations yet

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The viral #IceBucketChallenge is a stupid idea and makes you all look like morons, according to a man yet to single receive a nomination this morning.

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UK road users demand driverless cars learn appropriate ‘wanker sign’

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As driverless cars were approved for UK roads, drivers everywhere explained they would never be accepted until they can adequately abuse their fellow road users.

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Putting your entire life on Facebook ‘not compulsory’, finds study

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Millions of Facebook users were shocked today at the publication of a new legal investigation which revealed that publishing everything you ever do on the social network isn’t ‘compulsory’.

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Royal Mail urges people to change house numbers after data breach

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The UK’s Information Commissioner is today investigating a massive data theft of names and addresses from a Royal Mail facility in Slough.

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Claims that Michael Gove passed Turing Test ‘completely untrue’

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Recent claims by the Conservative party that Michael Gove has passed the Turing test and is therefore a real human being have turned out to be ‘inaccurate’.

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Google driverless cars to prompt you to be angry with other road users

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Google’s new driverless car will include digital instructions on when passengers should abuse fellow road users.

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