Sports

Sports news from NewsThump.com – bringing you the latest from the world of sport, updated every second.

Michel Platini boosts FIFA presidency hopes with conversion to Satanism

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Michel Platini moved a step closer to the FIFA presidency with his conversion to Satanism yesterday.

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Premier League wages ensure players can afford twice as much gaudy tat as Spanish counterparts

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The average premier league footballer can afford twice as much gaudy tat as their Spanish equivalent, according to a new wages survey.

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Sam Allardyce named as new Taliban leader

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In a surprise move, the Taliban have named British football manager Sam Allardyce their new leader after the death of long-term leader Mullah Omar.

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Banned football hooligans thinking of getting into cycling

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Football fans who have been banned from attending matches for hooligan behaviour are considering moving into the world of professional cycling.

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England vs Scotland World Cup Qualifiers to definitely bring out the best in everyone

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After England were drawn in the same World Cup qualification group as Scotland, experts everywhere said that this will definitely end up reflecting brilliantly on all concerned.

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Australia demands ‘Shark Punching’ be introduced as an Olympic Sport

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Australia wants ‘shark punching’ to be included in the 2016 Olympics, they have announced this afternoon.

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Australian cricket team deported under anti-terror legislation

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The Australian cricket team has been deported under anti-terror legislation, we can report this morning.

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Raheem Sterling transfer replaces Hatton Garden raid as Britain’s biggest robbery

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Lancashire Police have named a 52-year old man they wish to question in connection with what is being hailed as Britain’s largest of daylight robbery.

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Fabian Delph looking forward to challenging for place on Man City’s bench

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Aston Villa captain Fabian Delph is set to join Manchester City and has claimed to be relishing the chance to fight for a place on the bench at the City of Manchester stadium.

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Even Raheem Sterling’s mum now embarrassed about him calling in sick

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The mother of Liverpool winger Raheem Sterling has admitted she is embarrassed to phone the club to say Raheem won’t be in today because he has a ‘poorly tummy’.

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