Politics

Outrage as disabled man suggests Tory MPs ‘not worth the minimum wage’

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A disabled man has provoked outrage by suggesting that some Conservative MPs probably don’t deserve to be paid the minimum wage.

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Entire country voting Ukip, reveals new poll

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A poll conducted by 53 Year-old Miriam Knox from Stroud has revealed that everyone she talks to is voting Ukip.

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Rich people urged to carry Tory Donor cards

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People who give money to the Conservatives are being urged to carry Tory Donor cards so they can be denied urgent medical treatment in an emergency.

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Everyone racist

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The person sat next to you probably thinks you should go back where you came from, it emerged this morning.

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‘Foreign’ Ebola poses massive threat to our indigenous viruses, claim UKIP

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UKIP leader Nigel Farage has warned that ‘foreign’ virus Ebola threatens the jobs of many domestic viruses currently struggling to infect people in the UK.

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Lib Dems to unveil new policies they’ll ditch at first sniff of power

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The Liberal Democrat conference is expected to hear plans for an innovative new policy today, one that will be ditched as soon as the prospect of any power whatsoever is put on the table before them.

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Lib Dem conference delegate particularly looking forward to the orgies

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A first-time attendee of the Lib Dem conference in Glasgow is especially excited about the wild, uninhibited sex parties that must be going on there somewhere.

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We will let you hunt the poor with dogs, promises Osborne

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George Osborne today revealed Tory plans to legalise the hunting of benefit claimants through the countryside with dogs and horses.

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Put it in my offshore account, Farage tells new UKIP donor

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Nigel Farage has found a sudden use for the offshore account he had forgotten all about, it has emerged.

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Difficulty in getting a GP appointment to become 7-day frustration, vows PM

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The horror of simply trying to get an appointment to see your GP will extend into the weekend by 2020, the government will announce today.

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