Politics

My health is dependent on whether I’m running for President or being drafted, confirms Trump

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After Donald Trump’s doctor took five minutes to report that he’s the healthiest presidential candidate of all time, Donald Trump explained that his health status changes depending on what he’s being asked to do.

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Theresa May successfully achieves convincing smile

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Prime Minister Theresa May last night managed a convincing natural smile.

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French insist Judge Dredd removes his helmet

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The French government has insisted that future lawman Joe Dredd must uncover his face in their country.

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Richard Branson suffers nasty ‘accident’ after getting on wrong side of Jeremy Corbyn

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Richard Branson has ‘fallen off his bike’ shortly after getting on the wrong side of Jeremy Corbyn, we can report.

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Cut what you like, I’m about to get an extra £350m a week, says NHS

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The NHS has said that the draconian budget cuts revealed today are ‘no biggie’ because the health service will be swimming in cash once Britain leaves the EU.

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Annual Labour brewery piss-up in danger of cancellation

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Labour’s annual brewery piss-up may have to be held round at Jeremy Corbyn’s house after they completely failed to organise it.

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Labour MPs resort to dirty tricks to keep Corbyn out of his seat

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Labour MPs have unveiled their latest scheme to unseat Jeremy Corbyn by putting Virgin Trains reserved tickets on the opposition benches at Westminster.

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Witness claims Jeremy Corbyn uses sit down toilet when urinals are available

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In what continues to be a bad week for the embattled labour leader, allegations have emerged that Jeremy Corbyn once sat down in a toilet cubicle despite only having a wee and urinals being available.

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You need to tell more lies about immigrants if you want to win, Farage tells Trump

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Former UKIP leader Nigel Farage has told presidential hopeful Donald Trump that in his experience if you want to win a popular vote you have to really double down on your lies about immigrants.

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Man to deal with sexism on behalf of women

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The problem of sexism in society is set to be eradicated after a man has decided to deal with it once and for all.

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