Environment

George Osborne shot dead after child falls into his enclosure

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The Chancellor of the Exchequer has been shot to protect a child who fell into his enclosure.

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Pollen actually vegetable bukkake, hay fever sufferers told

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Hayfever sufferers say that thinking of pollen as ‘vegetable bukkake’ really doesn’t help a bit.

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Britain welcomes in autumn

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After a balmy four-day summer that saw temperatures reach 27C, Britain has said goodbye to barbecues and shorts, and welcomed in autumn.

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David Attenborough moves to Dagobah to teach next generation of naturalists

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David Attenborough has moved to the jungle moon of Dagobah to train the next generation of naturalists.

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Newcastle summer to happen on a Saturday this year, confirms Met office

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Geordies are celebrating the news that their summer is likely to fall on a weekend this year.

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Facebook servers under ‘enormous strain’ as snow sweeps UK

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Facebook servers have been put under enormous strain as the people of the UK rush to post pictures of the small sprinkling of snow outside their window.

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Pet shop has no idea if they stock chameleons

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A local pet shop has ‘no idea whatsoever’ if they stock chameleons.

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Park to install coin-operated swings, a premium slide, and a members-only roundabout

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Bristol is to follow-up a controversial charge for all ‘Parkrun’ participants with a series of further ‘paid for’ features in the city’s parks and playgrounds.

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Dad demands enquiry into why the bloody lights are on in there

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Against a fraught backdrop of a large electricity bill, Dad has demanded that an inquiry be held to get to the bottom of exactly why the bloody lights on are in there.

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Jumper dilemma for woman as week of inbetweeny weather hits

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A Maidstone woman is expected to spend the coming week deciding whether or not to take a jumper when she goes out as inbetweeny weather sweeps Britain.

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