Entertainment

New Mission Impossible film to feature Tom Cruise escaping from Church of Scientology

Thumbnail image for New Mission Impossible film to feature Tom Cruise escaping from Church of Scientology

The latest instalment in the Mission: Impossible franchise features Tom Cruise escaping from the Church of Scientology, we can report.

Read the full article →

Police Operations accused of using up all the best band names

Thumbnail image for Police Operations accused of using up all the best band names

Yesterday the Police, military, SAS, and counter-terrorism services began a mock two-day, Tunisia style, terrorist attack on the streets of London names Operation Strong Tower.

Read the full article →

Radio DJs already running short of hot weather songs

Thumbnail image for Radio DJs already running short of hot weather songs

Local radio DJs say their heatwave playlists are already reaching crisis point.

Read the full article →

Kanye West sentenced to death for crimes against Queen

Thumbnail image for Kanye West sentenced to death for crimes against Queen

Worst human being of all time and occasional musician, Kanye West, is to be executed next week after making a complete scrote of Queen’s unqualified rock classic, ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’.

Read the full article →

All gigs now ‘Festivals’

Thumbnail image for All gigs now ‘Festivals’

All gigs, concerts, and open mic nights are to be officially recognised as festivals from now on.

Read the full article →

Call to show ‘Expendables 3′ in school

Thumbnail image for Call to show ‘Expendables 3′ in school

Following a recommendation to show ‘Interstellar’ in school because of its scientific accuracy, there have been calls to show other films in schools to aid learning.

Read the full article →

Can you complain about the price of iPhones next, everyone asks Taylor Swift

Thumbnail image for Can you complain about the price of iPhones next, everyone asks Taylor Swift

After getting Apple to change the way it pays artists for the music it gives away for free, Taylor Swift has been asked to tweet about the price of iPhones.

Read the full article →

Rachel Dolezal to join reformed Black & White Minstrel show

Thumbnail image for Rachel Dolezal to join reformed Black & White Minstrel show

Former NAACP chapter president Rachel Dolezal is to reform the Black and White Minstrels, we can report today.

Read the full article →

Pam Ayres to replace Foo Fighters at Glastonbury

Thumbnail image for Pam Ayres to replace Foo Fighters at Glastonbury

Disappointment that the Foo Fighters have had to cancel their Glastonbury performance has been tempered with the announcement that West Country poet Pam Ayres will be replacing them.

Read the full article →

Top Gear fans delighted as abuse target is finally confirmed to be Chris Evans

Thumbnail image for Top Gear fans delighted as abuse target is finally confirmed to be Chris Evans

Top Gear fans were logging on to Twitter in a fervent state of rage-delight yesterday as it was revealed that Chris Evans would be hosting the show.

Read the full article →