Entertainment

New ‘Warhammer Kids’ line tears hole in reality and spawns new Chaos God

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The psychic shockwave amongst Warhammer fans at the idea of a ‘kids’ line has caused the warp to belch forth a new, terrible entity of Chaos.

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Morgan Freeman allegedly pinched woman’s arse while narrating the whole thing

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Morgan Freeman has been accused not only of sexually harassing women but of callously narrating the incidents as they happened.

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Goths want to wish you a happy World Goth Day, but can’t because, you know, ‘happy’

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Goths worldwide are acknowledging World Goth day today.

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Morrissey announces two hometown arena racist diatribes with songs

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Eighties icon and desperate old bigot Morrissey has announced two racist diatribes with songs to take place at the Castlefield Bowl in July.

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David Beckham under fire after tattooing himself during royal wedding

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Critics have hit out at soccer legend, David Beckham, who was spotted tattooing one of his legs during Saturday’s royal wedding ceremony at Windsor Castle

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Actress preparing to say something to Bishop

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An actress is about to say something to a bishop, oo-er missus, it has emerged.

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Prince Harry found tied naked to lamppost with L plate on his arse

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The soon-to-be Duke of Sussex is being hurried back to Windsor after being found stark naked in Dundee with a traffic cone on his head.

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“I’m not interested in the Royal Wedding” the new “I’m a vegan”

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A man who has no interest in the forthcoming Royal Wedding seems to think that everyone wants him to tell them.

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Arctic Monkeys confound fans by releasing an album of nursery rhymes

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Rock megastars The Arctic Monkeys have left fans bemused after releasing an album of their favourite nursery rhymes.

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Stacy’s mom now a great-grandmother

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In news guaranteed to make you feel old, that hot mom you fancied at school has become a great-grandmother.

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