Education

New study finds most minions quotes actually ‘by Hitler’

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More than 80% of uplifting and amusing quotes on minion memes are actually by Hitler, according to a study published today.

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Chilcot two weeks too late reminding Britain not to act on dodgy intelligence and no plan

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The Chilcot report has reminded Britain not to rush into anything based on dodgy intelligence and without a backup plan, but about two weeks too late.

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Banksy-inspired child draws cock on desk

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A school child has taken the message left by Banksy to heart and expressed himself through the medium of satirical artwork.

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Schools caught teaching children useful things

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Thousands of children are being taught things that may prove relevant.

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Schoolchildren to take Monday off

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Schoolchildren across the country have said they might take a holiday on Monday, depending what the weather does over the weekend.

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Age of Aquarius not really going as hoped, admit hippies

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The Age of Aquarius – which was expected to usher in a new era of peace and understanding amongst all mankind – is pretty much a wash, hippies have confirmed today.

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United States adds Algebra to list of terror organisations

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The United States has added followers of Islamic system Al-Gebra to its list of terror organisations today.

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Schools Mental Health champion axed for being ‘mad’

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Natasha Devon, the recently appointed Schools Mental Health champion has been axed following her ‘mad’ criticism of the current testing regime.

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Ministry of Magic abandons plans to force Hogwarts School to become an Academy

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The Ministry of Magic has announced it has abandoned plans to force Hogwarts to become an Academy of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

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We’ll stick with the pig guy, thanks, confirm voters

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Given a straight choice between a genuine socialist and a man who fucked a pig, voters have confirmed they’ll stick with the pig guy, all things considered.

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