Business

Millions of commuters pretending to be happy rail strike is cancelled

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Commuters all across the country have spent the afternoon in the office wearing fake smiles, and pretending to be really pleased that Tuesday planned rail strike has been cancelled.

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We’re only treating tenants with the contempt they deserve, insist Landlords

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The excessive cold, exposed electric cables, and lack of a door on your flat, are exactly what you deserve, according to Landlords this morning.

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Southern Rail revealed as ‘cruel experiment’

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Southern Rail has been revealed as a cruel experiment to try and test the physical and mental limits of the human population.

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We spent nine years perfecting this apology, insists Thomas Cook

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Thomas Cook’s CEO has apologised over the deaths Christi and Bobby Shepherd whilst on one of their holidays, saying the nine-year delay was to make sure the apology was perfect.

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New wonga ads feature man being eaten by massive shark

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Wonga’s new advertisements are to feature a debt-laden man being partly digested by a Great White ‘loan’ shark.

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Eight guaranteed ways to lose money and have fun doing it

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Many websites tell you how to save money. Well, we’re here to tell you otherwise.

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Olly Murs to present ITV Strike Xtra tomorrow on ITV2

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Olly Murs will provide backstage coverage of the ITV strike in tomorrow’s episode of ITV Strike Xtra on ITV2, according to sources at the station.

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Pope admits defeat after three-day attempted exorcism of Katie Hopkins

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Pope Francis is today recovering after an exhausting three-day exorcism that failed to expel the demons inside Katie Hopkins.

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Daily Mail journalist chokes to death after accidentally reading own article

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A promising tabloid journalism career was cut short today, when a junior Daily Mail reporter choked to death on his own bile after accidentally reading one of his previous articles.

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English and Scottish Sun newspapers urged to ‘take it outside’

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After taking diametrically opposite views of the SNP, The Sun and The Scottish Sun have been urged to take it outside and settle it like the Murdoch puppets they are.

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