Gary Stanton

Amber Rudd to force companies to publish lists of WhatsApp users

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Home Secretary Amber Rudd has called on UK businesses to publish lists of ‘subversives’ who use the messaging service WhatsApp.

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Matador whose anus was shredded by bull ‘happy to be metaphor for Brexit’

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A Mexican matador has likened Britain’s EU exit to being anally shafted by an aggressive bull.

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Woman in hijab who walked past terror victim worse than Myra Hindley, insist arseholes

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A woman in a hijab who walked past a victim of the Westminster terror attack is worse than child murderer Myra Hindley, cunts everywhere have suggested today.

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ISIS facing civil war over choice of Apple or Microsoft laptops

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ISIS terrorists are facing an internal civil war over which laptops are the best to bring down an airliner full of infidels, it has emerged.

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Motorbike should make ‘full recovery’ after being crashed by twat

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A motorbike is expected to make a full recovery after nearly being written off by a notorious bell-end.

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Nigel Farage’s head detonates after EU bans Muslim headscarves from workplace

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Nigel Farage’s head has detonated after meddling EU chiefs banned the wearing of Muslim headscarves in the workplace.

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Twenty million terrorists on brink of starvation, claims Trump regime

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Millions of radicalised African children are about to starve to death in a victory for Donald Trump’s America First policy.

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Emma Watson’s tits in bitter Brexit row

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‘All grown up’ actor Emma Watson’s breasts have fallen out over Brexit, according to reports.

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Theresa May handed lesson in basic human decency by backstabbing Tory shitbag

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Theresa May has received a lesson in basic human decency from a man who views Judas Iscariot as a positive role model.

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Police to explain what exactly the fuck is meant by ‘low-risk paedophile’

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Paedophiles not in possession of a dirty white van full of cute puppies represent a low risk to the public, police have confirmed.

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