Gary Stanton

World to recognise Moscow as capital of the United States

Thumbnail image for World to recognise Moscow as capital of the United States

A huge majority of countries from across the globe are to fully recognise Moscow as the capital of the United States, in a move likely to anger some Americans.

Read the full article →

Theresa May to convince DUP over terms of Brexit deal by insisting God wrote them

Thumbnail image for Theresa May to convince DUP over terms of Brexit deal by insisting God wrote them

Theresa May will persuade the DUP to sign up for her Brexit agreement with the EU by insisting that its terms were dictated to her by God himself.

Read the full article →

Boy George seriously injured after attempt to throw his arms around the world at Christmas time

Thumbnail image for Boy George seriously injured after attempt to throw his arms around the world at Christmas time

Pop star Boy George has been admitted to hospital after the latest attempt to throw his arms around the world at Christmas time ended in failure.

Read the full article →

Pardoned Thanksgiving turkeys should face death penalty, insist Republicans

Thumbnail image for Pardoned Thanksgiving turkeys should face death penalty, insist Republicans

The Thanksgiving turkeys pardoned by President Trump this afternoon should face death by lethal injection after looking at the Melania in the wrong way, Republican hard-liners are claiming.

Read the full article →

Aled Jones denies walking in the air with his ding dong merrily on high

Thumbnail image for Aled Jones denies walking in the air with his ding dong merrily on high

Fully-grown choirboy, Aled Jones, has strenuously denied allegations that he might have walked in the air while up to no good.

Read the full article →

Twitter ‘braver than Oskar Schindler’ after removing verified ticks from fascists

Thumbnail image for Twitter ‘braver than Oskar Schindler’ after removing verified ticks from fascists

Persecuted minorities the world over are breathing a huge sigh of relief after Twitter removed its approved status from several notable fascist knobheads.

Read the full article →

iPhone X performing badly in hammer stress tests, complain morons

Thumbnail image for iPhone X performing badly in hammer stress tests, complain morons

The iPhone X is so poorly made it is unable to withstand a sustained hammer attack without the glass breaking, numerous twats have concluded this morning.

Read the full article →

Bono’s money revealed to move in mysterious ways

Thumbnail image for Bono’s money revealed to move in mysterious ways

The considerable fortune of U2 frontman, Bono Vox, moves in very mysterious ways, it has been confirmed.

Read the full article →

Bake Off finalist’s cake ruined after Kevin Spacey found lying on top of it

Thumbnail image for Bake Off finalist’s cake ruined after Kevin Spacey found lying on top of it

Hollywood actor, Kevin Spacey, is facing fresh allegations that he tried to fuck someone’s cake, according to reports.

Read the full article →

Michael Fallon admits groping journalist and comes out as the Defence Secretary

Thumbnail image for Michael Fallon admits groping journalist and comes out as the Defence Secretary

Tory Minister, Michael Fallon has sought to deflect attention from a high-profile groping incident by admitting he is the Defence Secretary.

Read the full article →