Tuesday 30 October 2018

Man delighted to see end to austerity, despite spending last eight years blaming immigrants for struggling public services


happy man

A man is delighted that the government has claimed to be finally ending the period of national austerity, despite preferring to blame immigrants for the state of the public services he uses for the last eight years.

Simon Williams, 35, said he was pleased Philip Hammond confirmed in the budget that austerity is over, insisting it was “about time”.

“Austerity has been a national disaster. The cuts have hurt everyone, and our public services have been decimated in many areas,” he explained, seemingly unaware that last week he loudly told everyone in the pub that he couldn’t get a doctors appointment because of all the polish families now living in his town.

“My poor old mum had to wait eight months for a hip operation thanks to this governments policy of cost-cutting and reducing investment,” he went on, to the amusement of those who have been listening to him bemoan ‘health tourism’ caused by the EU since before the Brexit referendum.

“Did you know my bins only get collected every two weeks now? Just another failure of the government’s austerity programme and the cuts to local government funding that have affected the normal man on the street,” he explained, despite insisting last week that the council has no money because EU migrants keep coming over here and demanding council houses for their twenty-strong families.

It was pointed out to Williams that most of the problems he appears to have with today’s society are actually down to a lack of government funding, rather than EU migrants he blamed, and who it has been shown more than pay their way.

“That’s rubbish and you know it,” he argued, forcefully.

“And with austerity coming to an end just as we leave the EU, you’ll never be able to prove me wrong.”

I think, therefore I am (not a Brexit supporter) – get the t-shirt here!

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