Wednesday 18 July 2018 by Lucas Wilde

Donald Trump releases line of flip-flops


Donald Trump launches MAGA flip flops

You can order your “Make America Great Again” flip-flops now (made in China).

After first saying he didn’t see why Russia would have interfered in the US election and then suggesting he meant to say he didn’t see why Russia wouldn’t interfere in the US election, Donald Trump had a great idea to fleece the general public one more time.

“Nobody does a flip-flop quite like me, folks,” declared the President, holding the rubbish footwear aloft.

“These are the best flip-flops, they really are. They both flip and flop to a fantastic degree, you can ask anybody – don’t ask the FBI though, they hate my flip-flops. They’re cowards – actually, no, they’re great people, sorry, I misspoke.

“One thing’s for sure, these aren’t for sale in Russia, unlike me! Haha that’s a joke, just a joke. Don’t quote that.”

Trump’s spokesperson sighed, “Actually you can buy them in Russia. He signed the paperwork himself this morning.

“This is a terrible product and – much like the President’s backpedalling – nobody is buying it.

“Apart from Alex Jones. He’s ordered 600 pairs after we told him they stop your frogs turning gay.”

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