Wednesday 20 June 2018 by Lucas Wilde

Donald Trump appoints plucky newcomer Anakin Skywalker as head of Space Force


Donald Trump space force

Donald Trump has made his wisest appointment yet.

After announcing his desire to form a Space Force, the President called a press conference to announce his chosen leader of the branch of the military.

“Anakin’s young, but he’s smart as a whip, folks, let me tell you,” said Trump, his hand resting on the young man’s shoulder.

“This young man came from nothing, just like I didn’t, and he’s proven himself to be cunning and wise in a way that in no way foreshadows a dark and evil future, I promise you that. Plus his midichlorian count is yuge, if you know what I mean.

“We’re going to give him full control of the space force and we’re going to make sure he has a hand in looking after our young Space Force, and I don’t see how that could possibly go wrong. I don’t. It’s going to be great. So great.”

Skywalker commented, “Thank you, President Trump, I am honoured to be considered worthy of such a position.

“I may be young, but I will continue to work closely with both President Trump and my long-term mentor, Senator Palpatine.

“I look forward to getting started on my declared mission of restoring order to the galaxy, taking whatever steps are deemed necessary to achieve what must be achieved,” concluded Skywalker, in a tone that got a little bit menacing.

“Hahaha, no, he’s just fooling around folks…come on, Annie, let’s get you a Coke,” said Trump, quickly ushering young Skywalker out of the room.

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