Friday 15 June 2018 by Pete Redfern

Jesus said love your neighbour, not snatch their kids off them, Christians remind Sarah Sanders


Sarah sanders White house bible

Christians across America have reminded Sarah Sanders that the Bible recommends loving your neighbour, not incarcerating their kids after forcefully removing them from their grasp.

The ever truthful White House Press Secretary invoked the Bible at a press conference yesterday to defend separating children from their parents at the Mexican border.

“Oh yes, the Bible says a lot about tearing families apart,” Sarah Sanders told reporters.

“And Jeff Sessions was right to say that in Romans 13 there are specific instructions that Mexican parents should be separated from their children if they are illegally crossing a national border.

“Well probably. Neither of us has actually read the Bible, clearly.”

Christian Democrat Chuck Williams responded, “I haven’t read the whole Bible, sure, but I seem to remember a fair amount of it was Jesus telling people to love their neighbours.

“But they’ll probably insist we are just quoting the lovey-dovey stuff out of context.”

When reminded that the first amendment actually mandates the separation of church and state, Sanders said this didn’t apply to the Trump White House.

She told the press, “Look, all that separation of church and state stuff is just fake news, you should instead be focussing on how we’re adhering to the central tenets of the Bible, which our polling shows is extremely popular with our core base supporters.

“But no, we won’t be adhering to Leviticus 20:10, which demands we put to death Rudy Giuliani and his mistress; well, not until he’s finished defending the President against charges of collusion anyway.”

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