Tuesday 12 June 2018 by Tom Moore

North Korea agreement actually a planning application for new golf course


Trump planning application

The agreement signed between Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un has been revealed as an agreement to build a Trump golf course just outside Pyongyang.

Trump described the document as a “very comprehensive” agreement that would “take care of a very big and very dangerous problem for the world”, before describing that problem as a desperate lack of prestigious golf courses in the Asia Pacific region.

“I see a lot of potential in this country,” Trump told the world press. “They have so many beautiful beaches just ripe for links courses and their old nuclear facilities are perfect for crazy golf.”

An extract from the agreement read: The United States and the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea commit to establish new relations in accordance with the desire of the peoples of the two countries for an exclusive golf resort with 5-star facilities under the Trump brand, which is such a good brand by the way, just the greatest brand.

Trump has reportedly told Kim Jong-Un that he would like to secure weekly meetings with him, but only after the golf course has been completed.

“This is just perfect,” Trump told reporters.

“We can meet regularly and have lots of terrific terrific meetings. Really great meetings where we can discuss denuclearization, human rights abuses and also property development opportunities across the demilitarised zone.

“And I know that Chairman Kim isn’t only a great guy but he’s also a great golfer. He tells me he gets holes in on every time he plays.

“Just like I do.”

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