Monday 11 June 2018 by Neil Tollfree

Donald Trump to hold summit with Darth Vader


Trump summit with Darth Vader

US President and twice winner of Sex-Pest Monthly’s Man of the Year Donald Trump today begins his historic summit with Darth Vader in Singapore.

Initially, at the start of his Presidency, Trump struck up a belligerent tone with Lord Vader and The Empire, but after realising just how evil the Dark Lord of the Sith was, his tone softened as it became apparent they had much in common.

“He’s a good guy, a very good guy, lots of people are saying it,” said President Trump of one of the most evil beings in the universe.

“I think we’ve got a lot in common and I look forward to speaking with Lord Vader.”

The summit has proved controversial primarily due to Lord Vader’s record on human rights, with the blatant destruction of Alderaan being a particular sticking point for previous world leaders.

“Well, yes, that was tough for the people of Alderaan, having your planet obliterated and everyone you know being killed,” continued Mr Trump.

“But, you know what I think? I think that strong leaders sometimes need to take difficult decisions and Lord Vader is a strong leader, and I am a strong leader and that is why I think this may be a very good summit. A very good summit.

“A great summit.”

The White House has denied that Trump’s refusal to condemn Darth Vader’s destruction of an entire planet is an indication of how he intends to deal with Canada following the recent spat with Justin Trudeau at the G7 meeting.

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