Thursday 7 June 2018 by Pete Redfern

Vegan gammon now available


Morrissey is vegan gammon

Gammon can apparently come in vegan form now, according to reports.

An interview with Morrissey that was published yesterday, in which the singer showed support for Tommy Robinson and the recently formed and very xenophobic ‘For Britain’ party, has indicated that there are meat-free gammons out there.

Gammon expert Simon Williams told reporters, “The interview with Morrissey has raised a lot of questions about the nature of gammons.

“We have always thought that a major contributor to the crimson faces of the enraged middle-aged men typically found in the Question Time audience was the high consumption of red meat – in addition to only reading the Daily Mail and the ‘Leave.EU’ Facebook page, of course.

“But now up pops Morrissey, somewhat predictably, to prove that you can have a vegan gammon, whose views are just as unpalatable as your regular meat-consuming gammon.”

He added, “Someone should point at the irony to him, but perhaps on second thoughts, maybe not.

“There would be a danger he would write a song about it.”

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