Thursday 31 May 2018 by Pete Redfern

Confused Donald Trump demands Kim Kardashian ends North Korea’s nuclear weapons program


Donald Trump meets Kim Kardashian

There were baffling scenes at the White House yesterday after the President of the United States appeared to get his Kims confused.

Donald Trump summoned Kim Kardashian into the Oval Office for what she assumed was some sort of cheap publicity stunt aimed at stroking both of their egos, but instead found herself being asked to end the nuclear weapons development of her East Asian country.

“Well that was a bit weird,” she told reporters after emerging from the White House.

“When I walked in he seized my hand and told me I looked a lot taller and more attractive than he was expecting and complimented me on what I’d done with my hair, saying it ‘looked a lot better’ than it did in the photographs that he’d seen of me.”

She continued, “He also said he loved the fact that I had learned to speak American and that it sets a good a good example for all my North Korea population to follow, before suddenly asking me ‘So when are you going to end the North’s nuclear program?’

“I told him that our daughter North doesn’t have a career, but he wouldn’t stop going on about nukes. It was bizarre.

“I mean, I’m glad he didn’t try to grab my genitals, so I’m counting my blessings, but I don’t think I’ll be going back there in a hurry.”

Donald Trump is due to meet Kim Jong-un next month when he is expected to ask him about his marriage to Kanye West and if he has any tips on monetising his followers on social media.

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